Please don't call Stacey and Clinton

Last month I started wearing my approved-for-public-viewing clothing while staying at home. This was a big step for me. You see, I have a strict zoning system in my wardrobe. There is the now retired salsa zone from my previous life when I was an up and coming Salsera in Chicago. (And for any dancers out there reading, might I just add that dancing on two IS NOT SALSA. Salsa is on one, Mambo is on two.) Ahem. Sorry about that. That was old, salsera Priscilla talking, who actually liked to shake it at the Green Dolphin, baby, in silver lycra pants.

Moving on, there's the pyjama zone which is where all my other clothing zones go to die. My pyjama zone currently includes a thermal ski shirt that belonged to my dad in the seventies, various assorted gender-neutral treasures from Khalil, a couple of geek conference t-shirts my husband has picked up in the wrong size along the way with some accent toothpaste stains, flannel bottoms from when I weighed fifty more pounds, ah yes, and let's not forget my seventh grade "King and I" keepsake t-shirt in which I played somebody who sat in large group of people. What an important life I've led thus far. . .

Next we have the daily living section. This is the meat and potatoes of my wardrobe, the stuff I wear to Target, Trader Joes, lunch and when I used to go there, to the job. In this zone you'll find elite, incredible designers like Old Navy and anything sold at Marshall's, Ross, or T.J.Max.

Finally, we end with specials and miscellaneous. In this zone there's my wedding dress, a pea green suit with shoulder pads (from where else? Khalil, courtesy of my mother), some unmentionable lumpy knitted items (also courtesy of my mother), a gallibiya, and hoochie mama date night attire.

So when I say I started wearing my approved-for-public-viewing clothing you now understand that I moved from my saggy flannel jammies and tees with sayings like "udderly exhausted" or "agile 2005" to jeans in my actual size. I just woke up one morning and realized, this is it. At least for the next few years, this is the job, this is lunch with a friend, this is what there is in a day. And I moved up a zone.